Odd Job, who is this guy?

Well I am a short fat Chinaman with a deadly hat, who used to work for Spectre.
Now you say why did Odd Job become a gonzo? Well that is none of your business, punk. All you need to know is that Odd Job makes the smelliest farts and Odd Job has the worst breath: it can even make dogs faint!

So watch out. Don't hide behind the same crate as me, 'cos you will feel sick. And don't try to knife me because I will blow you away with my rectal thunder.

And remember the price-list: 'Ten dollar fucky, two dollar sucky'
I don't change my prices for anybody, fool.
.
.
..
.
..
.
.
.
..

.
..
.
.
.
.
.
And if you read all the way to the bottom here then you are a noob and I laugh in your face.... HA!

_________________
Nobody owns that energy, not one man and not one clan. It is borrowed for a short time.

damn it!!!

Odd job is a fucking hell of a role model for GONZO!

You have to love that man Twisted Evil

A POEM FOR YOU MAN! (with a little rhym at the end two lines!)

Take him in the arms
as a brother in arms,
and whisper gently
"Do you swallow for a Twenty??"

When I was at boarding school I had a problem with one of my room-mates. He would let out the most vile farts right there in the room and it was dreadful. Anyway he wouldn't change this behaviour so I set about getting my revenge, Odd Job style.
There was a squash court at the school and I played several afternoons one week without changing my socks. By the Friday these socks had their own pulse and were nicely 'animated'. They stank worse than a dead camel's anus.
When the guy went to see if there was any mail for him in the dorm-master's office I unfastened the press-studs of his duvet cover and stuffed one sock right in the bottom of the cover. The other one I stuffed in his pillowcase.

Now you might think it was unwise for me to hide the second sock in the pillowcase where it would surely be found within ten minutes. But...that was exactly the reason I did it. He found the sock in the pillowcase, almost puked, and threw it away. Yet over the next two days the terrible smell lingered around his bed.
"Don't worry," I said, "it's just the smell of that sock lingering on. Get some air freshener, mate."

It took a few days for him to realise that there was another sock and it was in his duvet cover. After that he didn't mess with Odd Job!

_________________
Nobody owns that energy, not one man and not one clan. It is borrowed for a short time.

i've just found evidence of Odd Job in action, look at this filthy old bastard and leran how to be a true gonzo... enjoy his stinky performance:

http://www.stupidvideos.com/video/just_plain_stupid/Farting_In_Bed/?c=just_plain_stupid&p=2

_________________
_______
gonzo|p.a.d.s

Ha ha ha

That dude is a farting noob. Not once did the blankets rise up to the ceiling. If that was me, that woman's hair would be waving around like she was driving a convertible with the top down at 100mph.
He's far to gentle to match me. When I fart its like a gale. And if I have been eating corn, then the poor woman in the same bed as me gets her arse sandblasted Twisted Evil

_________________
Nobody owns that energy, not one man and not one clan. It is borrowed for a short time.

I am officially announcing that Railhouse rules.
That is my house, man. I was born there.
I dig it.
Jaja.

_________________
Nobody owns that energy, not one man and not one clan. It is borrowed for a short time.

A little bedtime story for the gonzos and guests.

I once hid a dumbbell (die Hantel) in my house mates pillow while he was down the pub chatting up his current girlfriend. He managed to convince her to come home with him and got her upstairs. Unfortunately for him he jumped into bed and nearly knocked himself out before he could get junior wet! He had a big lump on his head instead of in his trousers.

Oh yeah...I also hid all his condoms in an empty wine bottle. The pair of them spent a good 20 mins trying to fish them out before he lost his temper and smashed the thing.

He got me back though...that is another story...

Oddjob: Yo mama is so ugly they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies Laughing

.

Are you ZAF or what?

Twisted Evil

That previous post was me by the way......forgot to log in Embarassed

Living in France has made u very stinky Razz

	Quote:
	Oddjob: Yo mama is so ugly they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies

rolmapaloozalololol.

I have a feeling the Jobz have your metaphorical guts for metaphorical kebabs for this one...

Lord Oddjob sire, Duke Splifflington hast skankethed thine honour and hairy bollocked thon bloated family crest. Hast thou no integrity thy snivling pomp! Avast! Yonder! Doth! .. ! and so on...

I need sleep... Shocked

cheers!

_________________
_______
gonzo|p.a.d.s

Misfit....you want some?

Yo moma got a job at the cinema.........buttering popcorn with her leg hair.

Don't you just love it?

Laughing

Thought for the day.....what is ET short for?

As Oddy and Spliffy live at opposing ends of the Channel Tunnel what would happen if they both farted at the same time.Answers to [force] Freekill Twisted Evil

lol.

@Spliffers: She only got that job since YO momma secrete so much butter.

_________________
馬鹿じゃないの?

@ Spliffy

Look, I can see you are trying, and I appreciate that. But nobody can equal the vile filth and subtle chicanery of Mr Odd Job himself. Compared to me you have the mental agility of a fridge magnet. We are talking professional vs amateur here.
Here is a proper insult:

Spliffy you are the fungus-encrusted louse embedded in the stinky dingleberry matted into the anal hair of a lesbian French poodle!

You see that? That took me 0.2 seconds to think up and it is an instant classic. I can teach you if you like (I give discounted rates to gonzos Wink

)

_________________
Nobody owns that energy, not one man and not one clan. It is borrowed for a short time.